Slow blink. Anyone know what a slow blink is besides Diane? It is when I turn and look at her after she makes a completely silly comment about something nonsensicle and very very very slooooowwwwwllllly blink my eyes in response to her comment. Diane is now "very offended and stuff". I asked her what the "and stuff" part includes and I get my usual response that I give her, 'dont you worry about what and stuff is". Enough quibbling, on with the weekend....
Four score and four days ago, we were all excited about going on vacation for a long weekend up to Grand Lake without the kids. This vacation has been in the works now for two months. We had to plan that far ahead in order to line up the baby sitter to watch the kids. We tried teaching the dogs to watch them, bathe them, feed them, change diapers etc, but I guess old dogs cant learn new tricks. Allie's idea of giving them a bath was to lick the graham crackers off of their hands. Guinness is the disciplinarian of the two. He likes to growl at them if he doesnt want to be disturbed. So, that plan just wasnt working out.
Diane has a great friend in Suzanne that volunteered to watch them for us for the whole weekend. We were originally going to come back on Saturday, but she insisted on us staying until Sunday. Bless her soul, that is what makes a real friend. So, Sunday it was. Her daughter Grace and Suzanne were going to watch our kids. They did a trial stay for us on the Rockies opening day where we went to the baseball game and stayed overnight downtown after the game.
Leading up to the weekend was pretty typical. Diane was paranoid that Wes or Mia were going to hijack a car or hold up a bank or something and we werent going to be able to go. She was following them around making sure they stayed out of trouble, stayed off the tables, didnt climb up onto the couches so they didnt fall off the back and break a limb. But, she was not able to keep daycare from revealing its wrath. The daycare attendee told us on Wednesday that Wes was really fussy and was crying all day. We just wrote it off as she didnt know how to distract him since she was new, or his teeth were still bothering him. He acted pretty good that evening for us, so we didnt give it a second thought. He also had a little spit up of his milk after dinner which we didnt think much of either. La La La, we are going on vacation....no kids, just beer and late nights for the both of us. We were destined to stay up until 10 even if it killed us.
Then all of our months of detailed planning fell apart. During the night, or early morning sometime, Wes puked on his bed. It was only a little one, so the plan goes on. We warm up the bottles, feed them both. They are both acting fine, lots of energy, throwing things they shouldnt be throwing, getting into things they arent supposed to be getting into. Wes had a wet burp, followed by another wet burp, then a cottage cheese throwup, however small it was. So we let them rest in their rooms while we get ready, hoping for the best, but really knowing in the backs of our minds, this isnt going to turn out well.
Time for breakfast. We give Wes some water thinking it would be better for his tummy than milk. Five minutes later, he projectile vomits. More water, more projectile vomiting. We take away the water, Wes screams. Cussing could be heard in the distance, must be the neighbors arguing again. We give Mia breakfast, at least she isnt sick too. Time to call Suzanne and let her know the story.
Amazingly, Suzanne tells us, "No problem, I've taken care of a sick kid before". Very hesitantly, Diane agrees to go ahead with our plans. Wes has actually been acting very normal so far except for the vomiting. He finally hit a wall around 9:30 and fell asleep on a pillow on the living room floor. Mia was constantly going up to him and rubbing his back and saying his name. After the two hour baby sitting orientation course, we are ready to leave. The course includes very detailed directions on how to do everything from changing a diaper, to feeding rituals and tieing your shoes. Thanks to Suzanne and Grace for being as patient as I am everyday in completing the course. Your diploma will be mailed in six weeks.
We were hoping for the best, hoping it is only a 24 hour bug. Wes didnt throw up anymore after we left. He was acting better and started getting into trouble again. Then Friday afternoon crept up on them. It was Mia's turn. She threw up 6 times in two hours right around bed time. Poor poor baby sitters, we felt so sorry for what they are going through.
So you are saying, at least the two of you get to enjoy your time away. Think again. Diane started getting sick on Friday afternoon. She took a nice nap instead of shopping while I went and played golf. I knew right then she couldnt be feeling good. The next morning Diane was walking around like a hunchback, moaning like a zombie and snarling like I pissed her off. She had spent the whole night, how to put this....in the bathroom. She couldnt decide if she wanted to sit on the toilet or hug it like her best friend. The noises eminating from in there kept me awake most of the night, I cant imaging what the people next door thought we were into. She was pretty much sick the rest of the day. She took a nice nap that afternoon after going into town and walking for five minutes, sitting for fifteen and repeating the process. I think she is really happy that it is a small town.
By the end of the day Saturday, she was feeling better but not 100%. We were able to go out to eat where I had an amazing smoked elk sausage and poorly smoked buffalo ribs. We then headed to a brewery where she was nice enough to let me drink a couple of beers before heading back to the hotel. Come to find out later that the hugging of la toilette ritual was also being performed back home by Grace. Now that is a babysitter taking one for the team.
We came back on Sunday late morning. Everything looked good, the kids were happy to see us and we think Suzanne and Grace were happy to see us show up too. Giving thanks to them cant show how much we really appreciate everything they did for us while we were gone. Although everthing didnt go as planned, it was good to get away for the weekend and had a nice time.
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